Void of Space

God, I am so screwed...

There's this girl that I found on the internet, on something called PlanetOut.Com. (I found the site when surfing the 'net for gay pride events and information). She lives in Colorado, probably only a little ways away from Denver. I looked at a few of her pictures on the personals part of PlanetOut, and I think it was the eyes that caught my attention. I can't help it, eyes are the first physical thing I notice... followed by the neck. But anyway, back on track. She's my age, maybe a month or so older. Sixteen.

I'd like to get to know her, but I'm scared to get into another relationship. The same thing that happened with Rachael will only happen all over again. I... I trusted Rachael. I did. She said she'd talk to me more, like e-mail or IMs, but she has yet to do that. I haven't been able to log onto the internet at home, cause mom says I'm "grounded" from the computer. I sent her one e-mail, got one response, responded to that, but haven't gotten anything.

Damnit, I work hard and get nothing in return. Great motivation, huh?

I think I'll stop belly-aching for now.

I am seriously screwed up. I don't know what to do anymore. She doesn't think it'll ever work out...

I feel dead inside. I should have listened to Jaey.

Fuck...

Gahh, I jinxed myself!

Sorry guys, if you're reading this.....

Okay, first time this happened I ended up viewing a blog of a person I didn't know. Now I can't look at my own, but my ex girlfriend's.

Maybe next time it'll be mine that everyone's looking at. But I can't even read this in my own blog. Not right away, like normal.

Gee, that'd be embarrasing. Having my ex see my blog and realize I can't get over her. I need a new life :p

Okay, blogspot's acting funny. This is a testing post.

And another thing! This was taken from a news piece I saw on Yahoo!

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BOXBORO, Mass. - Gov. Mitt Romney's top legal counsel told the state's justices of the peace Sunday to resign if they are unwilling to preside over same-sex marriages beginning next month.

Daniel Winslow said Romney expects the justices to comply with the law, even though the Republican governor opposes gay marriage and has sought to delay its court-ordered legalization on May 17.

"Gov. Romney understands and respects that people have very strong personal views both for or against same-gender marriage," Winslow told justices gathered to learn about the impending changes. "But on this point, the law is clear."

The Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court ruled in November the state must begin issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples by mid-May, which means changes for clerks and justices of the peace.

Refusing to marry gay couples could leave justices individually liable and raises the possibility of punitive damages in court, said David Fried, enforcement chief for the Massachusetts Commission Against Discrimination, who also addressed the gathering.

"To the extent that the justices of the peace have taken an oath to follow the law, it seems to me both appropriate and wise to do so," Fried said.

Nelson Goldin, one of the state's approximately 1,200 justices of the peace, said he believes marriage should be between a man and a woman only.

"But I took my oath of office and told them I will marry anyone who the commonwealth of Massachusetts says has the right to be wed," he said.

Meanwhile, Romney said same-sex couples who live outside the state will not be allowed to marry in Massachusetts when the law takes effect. He cited a 1913 law barring unions that would not be legal in the couples' home state.

"Massachusetts should not become the Las Vegas of same-sex marriage," he told The New York Times for a story in Sunday's editions. "We do not intend to export our marriage confusion to the entire nation."

Supporters of gay marriage say the 1913 law is discriminatory and was never envisioned to block same-sex marriage. They criticize Romney for adopting the broadest interpretation possible for the law.

Romney ordered changes to the state's marriage application, including now asking applicants for evidence of where a person resides and intends to reside. It warns out-of-state couples that if they do not intend to reside in Massachusetts, the marriage "shall be null and void."
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There's nothing wrong with moving to Massachusetts to get married. Heck, I'd love to live in Massachusetts. I think it's a fair trade; "We let you gays and lesbians marry your partners, but you have to come live here" is a good deal.

::dances::

It's been a long week, lemme tell ya...

Been depressed lately, because I still can't get over my ex. (Just goes to show I get too attached to people and things. Take it from me, don't let that happen. It only ends up hurting). And no matter how hard I try, I can't stop thinking about her.

Only about... five more weeks of school left. Thank God. And I don't want to ever see another prom dinner or Shirley Temple ever again. And for those who don't know what a Shirley Temple is (like me before I found out last night...) it's basically 7UP or Sprite mixed with a cherry flavoring they sometimes use in alcoholic drinks. But it's not alcoholic. Just cherry flavored. Yech...

Ended up going to a dinner at my mom's church. That was after I forced myself to go to Sunday Morning Mass at St. Pat's. I got a huge lecture about not coming to church from Sister Marietta when she came to eat dinner at Buffalo Point on Friday night. Made me promise to go to either the 8 am Mass or 10:30 am Mass.

Becky (my sister) and I are going to go see Hellboy tonight. I hope it's worth sitting on my butt for two hours and getting home between 11 pm and 11:30 pm.

And DGate's down. Again. Until Monday. I wanted to PT Alastrine today (and yesterday, but mom yelled at me), and I never got to do it. And tomorrow's a school day. But I think we get out early on Friday... Or not have school at all on that day. I hope, anyway. :p

Sheesh, I need to get back into the habit of writing in these things.

I'm gonna be playing around with the layout a bit, maybe I can get it to the way I like.

Okay, had to come to Blogger from Teen Open Diary, where I was getting a little harassment.

This is the starting entry! I'll post another one when I get home from school.