Void of Space

My DGate withdrawl is slowly coming back. The need to loose myself in a game has been getting stronger. I'm trying to find some way to cope with the pain and lonelyness; DGate helped. Kind of... It allows me to be something I'm not. To hide from reality for a while.

But Becca's gone and trashed all four of our computers. >_< Dad is supposed to be taking mine in to have it repaired. Then I can play again.

And now I'm depressed... Amanda hasn't told me if she can or can't go to dinner on Friday. I want her to, really bad, but nearly every time I ask to take her anywhere, it's always no for some reason or another.

It's things like that that make me want to let mom send me to live with my grandparents. But there... I can't be myself. I can't talk about being gay, check the sites I frequent... anything like that. That isn't what I want.

I don't want this rejected feeling, either...