Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Fuck it all.
She hates me... or, she never cared at all.
If she did, she wouldn't have broken her promise. If she did, she would have called. If she did, she would have returned my past three e-mails. If she did, she would never of said what she did, or done what she has. She never would have put me through hell, on more than one occassion.
If she did, she would have at least said good-bye.
Never should have put as much trust in her as I did. This always happens.
Yes, I've now entered the 'Anger' stage of the grieving period.
At least I've learned my lesson. Don't believe anyone, especially if they act like that. I'll just get used, taken advantage of.
That wasn't what I wanted, but I guess she didn't care because of who I am. Was. I'll never be like that again.
I'll be transferring my senior year, most likely. But I don't want to go to any of the schools that are nearby. Can't wait till I can leave, I'm never going to come back. Not for anyone, or anything. The folks won't be in Sidney, either, they'll have left by then.
Mom says one day people'll regret things like this. Feel guilty about the way they treated me. But it's only human nature to be greedy and selfish and lustful and mean. We're just animals. Smart animals, yes, but still animals. The modern world has just warped us. We don't do things like eat and have sex just as a means for survival of our race anymore.
It's just for fun.
Yeah, that's right. I am bitter, I will be for a while. But hey, I'm only human, just like everyone else. It's nature.
So three words; Get Over It.
(Note: This entry is not directed at anyone. So if you think it is, you are sorely mistaken. And have I ever lied? No.)
She hates me... or, she never cared at all.
If she did, she wouldn't have broken her promise. If she did, she would have called. If she did, she would have returned my past three e-mails. If she did, she would never of said what she did, or done what she has. She never would have put me through hell, on more than one occassion.
If she did, she would have at least said good-bye.
Never should have put as much trust in her as I did. This always happens.
Yes, I've now entered the 'Anger' stage of the grieving period.
At least I've learned my lesson. Don't believe anyone, especially if they act like that. I'll just get used, taken advantage of.
That wasn't what I wanted, but I guess she didn't care because of who I am. Was. I'll never be like that again.
I'll be transferring my senior year, most likely. But I don't want to go to any of the schools that are nearby. Can't wait till I can leave, I'm never going to come back. Not for anyone, or anything. The folks won't be in Sidney, either, they'll have left by then.
Mom says one day people'll regret things like this. Feel guilty about the way they treated me. But it's only human nature to be greedy and selfish and lustful and mean. We're just animals. Smart animals, yes, but still animals. The modern world has just warped us. We don't do things like eat and have sex just as a means for survival of our race anymore.
It's just for fun.
Yeah, that's right. I am bitter, I will be for a while. But hey, I'm only human, just like everyone else. It's nature.
So three words; Get Over It.
(Note: This entry is not directed at anyone. So if you think it is, you are sorely mistaken. And have I ever lied? No.)
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